Sometimes there comes a time when you need to take a good hard look at what you are doing. Work out what is working and what isnt. Work out where you can change things to make it better.
I have come to one of these points. I am super busy, and it feels like everything is work. The fun is missing somewhat. That’s not to say I dont have fun, because I do, I have some wonderful friends. However, I am not gaining as much enjoyment in what I am doing. Instead of seeing the positives in a situation I find all these negatives, and no where more so than in my art.
Part of the reason for this is that I dont do schedules very well, which is fine if everything is going well. But frankly everything isnt going well. I have now been sick, with some kind of stupid viral thing, for a month. No I dont have swine flu. It is just a cold, but it is lingering badly. This is compounded by having sick kids for three weeks as well. So this taking a toll physically. Add to that that I dont have my mum here doing all the stuff she usually does, meaning I have to do it. And I still need to meet all my other responsibilities.
I dont mind being busy, in fact I would prefer to have lots to do, I am easily bored, so having lots of different things to do means there is less time for boredom. Unfortunately it seems to got to a point where I dont want to do the work either, cos there just seems to be so much of it.
So after a long, indepth chat with my totally fabulous therapist, I realised it is time for me to get my act together. No more winging it, no more going with the flow… time to get some structure. Time to balance out the work with play better, so I dont skive off because I feel like I dont get any fun time.
So I started this process today… and now I will put it into practice.
This should mean I actually create more, because I am setting time for that, and time for the work and time for doing nothing but chilling.
Hopefully by doing all this I can find my energy again, and my joy and my excitement.
I hope to that by talking about this I can help someone else realise that sometimes you have to reassess what you are doing and how you are doing it.. because you are important.. and if you dont have you, you dont really have anything.
I will let you all know how I get along.